1.22.11...The Possi & Neggi Voices In My Head

"Whatever The Mind of Man Can Concieve & Believe, The Mind of Man Can Achieve."--Napolean Hill

This is my last post for the night...and Lawd only knows when  I will post again.  But, this post here is to speak simply about the voices in our head that say "we can't"...when we know we can.  Today, while, I was in class working problems, I noticed it again.  What? 

I noticed the frustration starting to take over when i could not solve a problem all the way through.  And, once that happens the voice begins to talk.  I am going to call him Neggy:)....Neggy says, "wasted your money again...why am i here?  I can't do this....I am nvr going to get the hang of this stuff.  Its so stupid."  Then, Miss Possey rolls on up in there and says, "This class is worth it.  I am going to get it.  I may not be getting all of it right, but when we are going through the problems, I am getting 1/2 of it right!   I am making progress.  Just keep at it!  I can do this.  I can do this.  I can do this!  I will get there."  And, after Miss Possey rolls on in there, I relax, reaffirm myself that I know this information is in here.  It is just a point of reuniting with it.  There you go..it a 10 Yr Reunion, lol.  And, as it becomes active and alive again within my brain....it's Str8 On & Poppin'!!!  4 Sho!  And, that is it.  I have been working heavily on the internal self talk in regards to this test.  It no longer bothers me that I have to take the test.  I am comfortable with the fact that I can perform well on it.  I just have to keep reminding myself of those simple words, "I can do this".  And, I just repeat that everytime, I get a question wrong or right.  I keep saying..."Baby Steps"..."Small efforts & consistent practice over time will pay off".  It is almost the concept of delayed gratification. 

I keep taking baby steps.  I can compare this process to my son when he first started crawling, then walking.  His would roll over on his stomach.  He knew he had arms and legs, but didn't quite know what to do with them.  So, he would just stretch them out and push them up and down.  He looked like a little fish that had been thrown out of the water trying to get back in, lol.  One day, he looked at me and realized while I was down on the floor with him that I too had arms & legs.  And, I was using them to kneel down on the floor to encourage him:).  It took a while, but the light bulb eventually went off in his head that he had the same things Mami had.  And, he could use them the same way...after that he wasn't a fish out of the water anymore.  He became a baby bunny.  You know baby bunnies don't quite know how to hop yet.  So, he would just rock back on his hands and knees trying to get somewhere.  Then he realized he could use his hands to pull him self.  There ya go!  Another light bulb turned on!  And, finally, on his first Christmas, while Grandma was playing with him on the floor.  He took off in a stoop crawl.  And, he realized he was mobile too......and then he got to going!!  No one could stop Him!  Lol...anyway, I say all that to say that Just like my son, this process is slowly teaching me how to do what I already know how to do again.  I just have to keep believing. Presevere, and ultimately.  I will get where I am going.  I will gRock the Gre!

As Always...Be Luv♥!
Ra'